


Death is Inevitable

by Sugar Muse (SugarMuse)



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Enabling Megaera, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Frottage, Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, Jealous Thanatos, Light Angst, M/M, Oblivious Zagreus, One-Sided Attraction, One-Sided Relationship, Pining, Pining Thanatos, Rating Up in Last Chapter, Slow Burn, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:34:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27342070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarMuse/pseuds/Sugar%20Muse
Summary: This pain became infuriating for the god of death. It meant catching onto Zagreus’ process, but only when that process had come to an end. While he had braced himself against the physical pain, there was the lingering sensation of helplessness when it came to his friend. That helplessness was what drew him back to the bannister overlooking the Styx again and again, a desperate need to see with his own eyes that Zagreus would drag himself out once more.Perhaps that was why he had gifted the prince the Pierced Butterfly--its powers best invoked when its wearer remained healthy and whole. A reward for staying out of the Styx. A reward for not worrying Thanatos so much.
Relationships: Megaera & Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Megaera/Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Thanatos & Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 25
Kudos: 299





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I love my moody soft boi, Thanatos, and wondered what his pining perspective has been this whole adventure, so I wrote my interpretation of it. 
> 
> Mild spoilers for Hades. Also I pulled some of the dialogue from the game because it was just too yummy and perfect.

“Quite a mess you’ve made here, Zagreus.” The god of death stepped out into the heat of Asphodel, his portal dissipating instantly into dark wisps of smoke. His lips twitched into a small smirk as he noted Zagreus’ surprised expression. It was clear the prince hadn’t been expecting any friendly faces to be showing up. Though if Thanatos were honest with himself, he doubted most he’d come across would describe him as _friendly_. 

A god of few words, Thanatos materialized his scythe as the creatures of Asphodel made themselves known. He nodded to the still confused Zagreus, who straightened out and reached for his own weapon. Thanatos recalled the many times Achilles created similar contests of skill when training the prince when he was still a fledgling. Thanatos had been born with a talent for slaying, but Zagreus was the enchanting one in battle, his swiftness only perceivable because of the sparks that would crackle and fly from the soles of his feet as he fought. 

Caught in the memory, the god of death was surprised to find himself bested in terms of who dealt more final blows. Zagreus turned to face him, a smile on his face and a hand moving to his hip in acknowledgment of his victory. Thanatos rolled his eyes but managed a small smile back. 

“Suppose you just might make it out this time then.” Thanatos’ reflection was a mix of praise and dread. Zagreus put a hand on his shoulder. 

“Doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate your willingness to stick your neck out for me now and again, old friend.” The prince reached for a bottle at his belt, offering it to Thanatos. “Here, a sign of my gratitude.” 

Thanatos stared at the nectar. If not for his supernatural complexion, he may have been caught flustered in the moment. 

“Death isn’t one to be placated with offerings, Zag.” It was the prince’s turn to roll his eyes at him even as Thanatos still accepted the bottle. He snapped his fingers, an intricate butterfly brooch materializing in between them. “Consider this an exchange. And don’t tell anyone about this.” 

Thanatos stared at his oldest friend as Zagreus accepted the brooch. He floated there just a beat longer before turning, a new portal materializing. 

“Than, wait--” 

“Don’t die here, Zagreus.” And the god was gone. 

Hours later, a familiar tug at his chest confirmed that Zagreus hadn’t been wise enough to heed his warning.

* * *

Thanatos floated down the hallway, pausing at the balcony that looked down upon the Styx. His eyes narrowed as he searched the murky waters. 

Moments later, a familiar silhouette emerged, the defeated form of Zagreus climbing the steps out of the river. The god of death watched silently as his prince shook out his clothes and ran a hand through his damp hair. As Zagreus took his first few steps in his next life, Thanatos took a moment to exhale. An ugly feeling sat in his chest: a poisonous mixture of disappointment for his friend and relief for himself. 

Zagreus didn’t know how good he had it here, Thanatos often told himself. The prince glorified that damn outside world, but Thanatos knew better. He knew of those frivolous mortals and their unending wars. He knew of those petulant Olympians who egged on the slaughters or dealt more chaos in their own selfish ways. Immortality allowed the gods to take their lifetimes for granted. But Thanatos knew the thoughts and feelings of those whose time was up. He had never collected a soul who died without regrets. 

Thanatos caught a glimpse of his brooch pinned to Zagreus’ chiton and for a moment the ugly feeling settled. He turned his back on the Styx, aware that he was on the clock--always on the clock--and uninterested in a lecture from Hades should he appear to be slacking. 

* * *

Thanatos had a unique relationship with pain. When he first became the god of death, it was a sensation he thought he would never rid himself of. After all, the Fates’ cruel sense of humor meant “gifting” him with the sense of when a life was lost. Sometimes he would feel a throbbing in his temples, other times a cramping sensation in his gut. His fingers would prickle like pins and needles or his eyes would sting. 

It took a few centuries, but eventually Thanatos disciplined himself to acknowledge these feelings less as a hurt and more as a piece of knowledge. Even now during war times he wouldn’t so much as flinch despite the waves of soldiers that would be in need of reaping and collecting. So it truly took him by surprise the first time he nearly keeled over from the sudden burning in his chest. At first he thought it must have been a god’s wrath incurred, the slaying of hundreds at once. 

Instead, Thanatos learned that day was the day of Zagreus’ first escape attempt. It also became the day Thanatos felt the pain of death he couldn’t brush off as just knowledge. 

This pain became infuriating for the god of death. It meant catching onto Zagreus’ process, but only when that process had come to an end. While he had braced himself against the physical pain, there was the lingering sensation of helplessness when it came to his friend. That helplessness was what drew him back to the bannister overlooking the Styx again and again, a desperate need to see with his own eyes that Zagreus would drag himself out once more. 

Perhaps that was why he had gifted the prince the Pierced Butterfly--its powers properly invoked when its wearer remained healthy and whole. A reward for staying out of the Styx. A reward for not worrying Thanatos so much. 

And if Zagreus continued to insist on offering rewards in return, then who was Thanatos to pass up on those generous bottles of nectar? 

* * *

“You've been abetting him, Thanatos. Behind my back! Betrayal. I would ask you why. Well?” The God of the Underworld chastised him from behind his desk. It had been only a matter of time before Hades had caught wind of Thanatos aiding his son. 

“My lord, he and I…” Thanatos trailed off, unsure of what he was trying to convince Hades. Or was it more something he was trying to convince himself of? _Zagreus didn’t ask me to get involved…_ He cleared his throat and shook his head, staring directly up into Hades’ cold red eyes. 

“Go lock me up in Tartarus, or deal whichever justice you see fit. But, my loyalty is not subject to change.” This time it was Hades who shook his head, pinching his temples between his fingers. 

“This is your realm, not mine; I'll not cast you into that wretched pit.” Thanatos felt the tension leave his shoulders, but he was smart enough not to look relaxed in front of his Master just yet. “It's not like I have someone to replace you here, besides. Now then, begone.” 

Thanatos gave a small bow, but Hades was already back to his endless paperwork. It was a wonder if they would ever get this House in order. 

Properly dismissed, Thanatos made his way to the lounge. For all the mischief Zagreus had been causing in the realms, he seemed to be making up for it in the gems he invested into renovations. The room was as lively as a space in the House of Hades could get, which Thanatos utterly detested. He had come here for a particular reason, that reason leaned over one of the high top tables across from Megaera. He felt like it was becoming more and more common to catch the two of them together like this.

As far as the Furies went, Megaera was certainly the most palatable of the sisters. Thanatos even found himself fond of her dry wit and her prowess for keeping kills clean and efficient. Whenever he caught her with Zagreus, however, he found his mood soured. He was doing a good job of telling himself it was because of how often Meg sent Zagreus back into the Styx. 

“Death has arrived,” Megaera announced as he approached the table, causing Zagreus to turn and smile at him. Thanatos nodded in acknowledgment. Megaera cackled and threw her shoulder over him. 

“See, Thanatos? This is what I like about you, never one to waste your words. Zagreus over here meanwhile thinks a few pretty stanzas and some accompanying bottles of nectar are enough to have me take it easy on him next time he’s foolish enough to run out of here.” The Fury laughed and held up one such bottle to her lips, her cheeks flushed from its saccharine sweetness. Thanatos caught the way the tips of Zagreus’ ears deepened at the teasing. 

“Oh come on, Meg. I already told you, the bottles haven’t been to go easy on me, they’re--” 

“Oh yes, what _are_ they for then Zagreus?” Zagreus’ mouth shut at the sudden interruption, his mismatched eyes widening at Thanatos. Thanatos’ expression mirrored the prince’s, not expecting his own outburst. Megaera’s grin widened, her arm coming off of Thanatos but not before patting him on the back. She put the emptied bottle down on the high top. 

“Delicious.” From the antagonizing tone, Thanatos assumed the Fury wasn’t just talking about her drink. “Well boys, that’ll do it for me. Looking forward to whipping your ass again soon, Zagreus.” Megaera sauntered away, leaving Thanatos at the table with a bewildered Zagreus. 

“Forgive my outburst, I’m--” A gentle hand fell upon the juncture between his shoulder and his neck. Why was everyone touching him today? 

“Father’s ire got you shaken?” Zagreus asked gently. Thanatos raised an eyebrow before remembering how Hades’ booming voice traveled through just about any hall in this House. To blame his earlier scolding was an easy scapegoat. The god of death wasn’t too proud to take it. 

“Nothing shakes me,” he retorted with feigned annoyance, his entire being calming now that it was just the two of them again. His prince laughed at him and Thanatos could feel the way the other god’s thumb massaged into his skin for a brief moment before letting go. 

“You’ve seen a lot of Megaera lately, haven’t you, Zag?” Thanatos didn’t miss the way Zagreus’ face grew flush once more. 

“It's not like that, Than. She's there to slow me down. Get in my way.” Zagreus released his shoulder and Thanatos instantly regretted bringing the Fury up again. 

“If you insist.” The god of death backed down, an act of mercy on both Zagreus and himself. For one, he couldn’t handle knowing that he was the one making his prince so uncomfortable. For another, he was too much of a coward to even want to hear his suspicions confirmed out loud. 

“Hey,” Zagreus cleared his throat. “You look like you could use a drink, and I happen to have an extra one on me so…” Thanatos wondered when he had become so easy to placate. He grabbed the nectar, toying with the cork for only a moment before bringing the opened bottle to his lips.

The offering tasted sour going down, Thanatos unable to shake the feeling that he was being duped. Nectar offerings among the gods were meant to make them feel special and revered. Thanatos only felt stupid. Weak. That feeling of weakness grew as he caught sight of how him drinking made Zagreus smile again. 

_So damn weak for a smile._

* * *

Pain had become knowledge for Thanatos long ago. So what did the dull ache that plagued his chest even when Zagreus was very much alive mean? What possible knowledge did it hold for the god of death? What secret wisdom was it attempting to reveal to him? He pondered these questions as he seamlessly moved through the realms. It was proving to be a busy work day. 

A throbbing in his temples: a man stabbed through the heart by a jealous lover. 

Pins and needles in his arms: a beggar woman lost to starvation. 

An itch behind the knee: a soldier--Thanatos gasped, another announcement tearing through his body. 

_Hades slain by his own son._

Zagreus had done it. 

Thanatos was in a portal immediately. He rushed to the edge of the Styx, waiting. The unmistaken roar of Hades bellowed through the West Hall as the god of the underworld emerged from the river’s depths. The entire House fell silent as its Master returned to life. The shades that wandered the halls shook and shrunk, leaving a clear path for Hades to make his way down. 

“Zagreus has done it then?” Hypnos, his brother, whispered in disbelief to anyone who might dare to reply. Thanatos stared at the fading footsteps at the base of the river, at a loss for words. Just as he thought he might muster something up, a searing pain erupted from behind his sternum. 

_Zagreus, natural causes._

Thanatos went to collect this soul himself. 

* * *

While the life of mortals had expanded in recent centuries, too often were those lives still up before their time. When a soul finally reached its natural passing, Thanatos had created the reward of a personal visit. He considered this visit a final comfort for the departed, gently ferried into the after life rather than be dragged into the Styx violently. 

He had never imagined offering his prince this tender send off.

Thanatos entered the clearing, seeing a woman hunched over the still body of Zagreus. When she turned to face him, Thanatos recognized the lively green eyes of the goddess. 

“Death,” she greeted. 

“Spring,” he acknowledged in return. Persephone smiled sadly at him, stepping away from her son. 

Thanatos knelt down by Zagreus, gently reaping his soul from his body. Even Zagreus’ soul was radiant, a bright silhouette of reds and golds and greens. Thanatos held the soul close to him, eyes closing. For a moment, Thanatos could see the glimpse of a twisted future. He saw himself not returning Zagreus to the Styx, tucking this bright soul away in a corner of the earth no other creature would ever find. He envisioned no one getting to hold Zagreus close like this again, the prince becoming a special treasure that only he knew of. 

Thanatos shook slightly, unconsciously nuzzling his face into the crook behind Zagreus’ ear. As he pulled away, he noticed an unfamiliar accessory--a skull earring to be exact. Realization doused him more harshly than if he himself had been thrown into the Styx.

No, this prince was not his to treasure. Thanatos stood, gaze hardening as he brought Zagreus back home.


	2. Chapter 2

The lounge was oddly quiet that evening. Thanatos thanked the gods for that. He had thrown himself into his work as of late, needing a productive distraction.

_“Thanatos, even we gods require rest from time to time.”_

Hades’ recent words echoed in his mind as he sank back into the plush, remodeled lounge chair. Most were weary of Death. Today he felt weary of _being_ Death. He thought of Hypnos, for a brief moment jealous of his brother’s aptitude for slumber. While Death brought eternal rest to mortals, Thanatos himself was hardly ever rested. In that way he supposed he and Zagreus were quite similar. 

There he was again, still thinking about Zagreus.

Thanatos stared up at the Featured House Servant board, his own expressionless portrait staring out into nothing. Somehow it felt like a taunt. Did he always look so...cold? He shut his eyes, not wanting to look at himself anymore. 

For several minutes, perhaps even hours, it just got to be him and silence--save for the occasional musings of Chef at work. 

This spell of silence was all too soon broken. He cracked an eye open to catch a bashful Zagreus standing by the chair across from him. 

“Ah, good evening.” The prince shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “Mind if I take this seat?” Thanatos opened both eyes now, quietly nodding. “It’s good to see you outside of battle.” Zagreus offered a small smile before sitting down, resting his elbows on his thighs as he leaned forward. Unable to help himself, Thanatos stared at the way Zagreus’ chiton exposed more of his bare chest, a prominent bite mark bruising the skin just below his nipple. 

“Oh--” Zagreus caught him staring, sitting back up and straightening the fabric of his chiton. 

“I had wondered what held you up. Hadn’t seen you crawl out of the Styx in a while.” The prince flushed so deeply Thanatos could see even his neck start to turn red. Because he simply couldn’t help himself, he continued. “Tell me, does Megaera really reserve the whip for Tartarus or…?” 

“Come now, Than. What sort of gentleman would I be to kiss and tell?” Zagreus’ tone was light-hearted, his dulcet tones an extended olive branch to get them back to neutral territory. Thanatos took it, swallowing down his jealousy. 

“I suppose I can’t imagine you a gentleman, Zag.” He forced a smile and Zagreus humored him with an honest laugh. 

“And I couldn’t imagine you taking a break, yet here you are.” 

“Mm. Here I am.” He waited a beat. “Since we are talking about impossibilities made possible, does this mean you’re done with your escape games?” 

“I can’t, Than.” Zagreus shook his head, sitting a little straighter. “Not until I have more answers. And I told Mother I would continue to search for them.” 

“You’re sullying my name, you know. Rumors are bound to spread that Death is a welcomed thing with how quickly you run to it.” Thanatos heard the entendre in his own words, licking his lips. 

“Welcomed? No, but…” Zagreus looked to the side a moment, as if recalling a memory. “Somehow death on the surface feels...intimate. Like I’m being held.” Thanatos tore his gaze away from the wistful expression on his prince’s face. 

“I have work to attend to.” He rose from his seat, but Zagreus rose equally as quickly, hand already reaching for Thanatos. 

“Wait. Please?” The god of death remained still, unable to disregard Zagreus’ pleading tone. The prince seemed surprised by this, his hand now awkwardly meeting Thanatos’ chest as though he hadn’t actually expected the other god to wait for him. Thanatos felt him still in return before tentatively spreading out his fingers until they were splayed across Thanatos’ gilded collar. He watched silently as Zagreus began tracing along the intricate adornments and markings. 

“Than,” Zagreus started as he looked up at Thanatos, “am I...have I hurt you?” The god of death chose his next words carefully. 

“To me, hurt is merely knowledge.” His eyes flickered back down to where he had seen the offending bite mark, though it was now covered up. Zagreus didn’t seem willing to back off. 

“But you _are_ hurting then.” There was an uncomfortable blend of concern and determination in Zagreus’ voice that Thanatos wanted to do away with. He moved his gaze to the hand on his chest. 

“I--” He took the hand into his own, pulling it away from his chest. The last few chances Thanatos had to touch Zagreus like this, Zagreus was only a soul. Feeling the warmth that came off of Zagreus’ body, knowing that the other god in front of him was very much alive, it created a crack in Thanatos’ armor. He bowed his head, bringing his prince’s hand up to his own face.

“ _Yes_ ,” he whispered harshly, brushing his lips against Zagreus’ knuckles. “ _All of the time._ ” Thanatos shut his eyes, swallowing down all of the other secrets still unspoken as he released Zagreus and stepped back into his portal. He ran.

A few hours later, Thanatos was aimlessly wandering the halls when he felt that familiar ache in his chest. 

“Must’ve gotten distracted out there, huh buddy? You seem to be back much more quickly than usual,” Hypnos’ reflections echoed through the House. 

“Distracted, yeah…” Zagreus’ agreement trailed in response. 

Thanatos lingered, waiting for more of the conversation, but that was the end of it. A wicked feeling crept into his gut. 

For once, Thanatos was glad that Zagreus had died. He knew it meant that those Fury’s marks were gone from his reborn body. 

Thanatos’ gong stopped ringing among the realms for some time after that evening.

* * *

“His attempts take their tolls on all of us.” Thanatos turned to see Nyx emerging from the shadows. 

“I’m not sure I know what you are talking about.” She clicked her tongue at him. 

“Have the recent centuries turned you daft without my knowing?” Though the words were insulting, there was a teasing tone to the way his mother offered them. He caught the way one of her thin eyebrows sloped up, clearly uninterested in his usual ‘hard to express his feelings’ act. 

“Daft? No. Hopeless? Well…” 

“Come.” Nyx sat on one of the chaises, the fabric of her robes and silks cascading around her. She ran one of her alabaster hands along her lap, looking at Thanatos expectantly. 

Many millennia ago, before Thanatos had learned to deal with the constant pains and reminders of death, he would turn to his mother in this way. She would wrap him up beside her and sing nonsensical tunes. Thanatos had never had the heart--nor the bravery--to tell the goddess of night that her singing could use some work, but the act of comfort worked all the same. 

He knelt before Nyx now, resting the flat of his cheek against her thigh, eyes shutting as her fingers threaded into the hair at the nape of his neck. The more time that passed, the more deeply he allowed himself to press against her. Thanatos knew that in these moments, Nyx would never rush him away. She would wait, comfort, simply be with him until he didn’t need her anymore. He didn’t know many other mothers well enough to know if this was commonplace in their procedures, but the god of death knew he was grateful for it. 

“How did you know?” He asked quietly, words somewhat muffled as he continued to hide his face in her robes. 

“My child. It’s quite the event when another god’s moodiness can rival the Master’s.” Thanatos lifted his head up at that, balking at his mother. 

“Surely you jest. As moody as Lord Hades?” Nyx laughed at him, the sound airy and almost unnatural sounding. She pushed the loose hairs from his face to better look at him. Her eternal eyes softened in recognition.

“Moreso what I’ve noticed is another god working himself into the ground so as to ignore his bleeding heart.” Thanatos felt simultaneously caught and freed. He shuddered in his mother’s arms. Yes, it was oddly freeing for someone to finally speak aloud what he had ignored naming for so long. He was heart broken. 

Thanatos’ arms came up to wrap around Nyx’s legs as he pushed his face back into her lap. A silent sob wracked through his body and his blessed, merciful mother said nothing. Nyx merely continued her ministrations, soothing the god of death as he trembled and caught up with the feelings he had locked away for so long. 

“How is it that Eros is not nearly as feared as I?” He whispered, voice wet with tears and self-deprecation. “I’ve never known a greater or more persistent pain.” 

“What knowledge is within that pain, Thanatos?” Nyx’s inquiry echoed the same question Thanatos had been asking himself for so long now. 

“I--” His mind became flooded with Zagreus. The way he moved as swiftly as fresh sparks. His smile. The irritating way the prince rested his hand on his hip and smirked when he won. His voice. The way he looked content when he died in Persephone’s arms. His tenacity. The radiant golds and greens and reds of his soul. His look of confusion and hurt when Thanatos had fled from the lounge.

“I--” A different and yet equally familiar pain bloomed in his chest. “I have to go, Mother.” 

In an instant he was once again surrounded by spring. It had been a while since Thanatos was able to collect his prince himself, but Persephone still greeted him warmly. He gave a curt nod in return before moving to the task at hand. 

“He seemed even more tired than usual,” the goddess mused as Thanatos knelt down beside Zagreus’ body. Wordlessly, he pulled the prince’s soul to him, curious as to what Persephone meant by that. Cradling Zagreus in his arms, Thanatos scanned his ethereal body. While it was near impossible to find exhaustion in a soul at eternal rest, something else caught his eye. The Pierced Butterfly was nestled in the folds of Zagreus’ chitton, just over his breastbone. Death shook, his chest burning.

“ _What knowledge is within that pain, Thanatos?_ ” His mother words inquired again in his mind. Thanatos turned his back to Persephone, hunching over as his lips skimmed the ghostly form of the brooch. 

_I love him._

* * *

It was dangerous to wait here, especially now that he knew what he knew. The curtains of the bedchambers’ entrance shifted, Thanatos watching as his prince returned. Said prince was clearly taken by surprise. 

“Than!” Zagreus appeared to be caught between running up to the god of death and staying in place. The result was his prince standing in the middle of the room with his arms outstretched yet hesitant to close the distance. “What are you doing here?” Thanatos took in his prince’s appearance, realizing now what Persephone must have meant. Something was missing from the prince’s usual fire, though the soles of his feet still remained ablaze. 

“I’m here to make sure you get some rest, Zag.” 

“Haven’t you heard, Than? I’ll rest when I’m dead.” 

“Yes well we both know you’ve been dying plenty recently, so why do you still look like shit?” Thanatos was never one to regret his bluntness, but he did notice the way it caused Zagreus to recoil some. 

“It’s good to see you.”

“Is it?” Thanatos asked in disbelief, not disregarding the way his question was sidestepped. Zagreus nodded, finally moving closer to the other god. 

“I don’t think I have since, well…” his words trailed off, both of them remembering that their last encounter had been that evening at the lounge. At least, their last encounter with both of them conscious, Thanatos thought to himself. 

“Let’s not speak of it.” 

“No?” 

“No.” 

“Come, Than. Why not?” 

“I have nothing to say about it.” Thanatos crossed his arms in front of him as though to create a barrier between himself and the continued advances of his prince. Zagreus seemed unwilling to back down. 

“Then why did you run?” The god of death’s eyes narrowed at the accusation. Sure, it was true, but it didn’t mean he had to accept the call out. Zagreus carried on. “Was it...is this about Meg?” 

At the on point accusation, time for a moment stood still. Thanatos found himself left with two options: to run once more or to be truthful. Running would keep him safe. Answering would at least have him back on the offensive again. Tired of how weak he had been, he stood his ground. 

“Yes.” Thanatos shut his eyes, waiting for the blow back. Instead, he felt a reassuring hand against his bicep. 

“Gods, I knew it. I am so sorry, old friend.” Thanatos shook his head, feeling boneless now that the energy of his secret was outside of him. “I swear in the years we’ve all been together, I didn’t see any signs. Though I suppose you knew her far longer than I’d even been around…” Unclear of what his prince was going on about, Thanatos reopened his eyes. 

“What in hell are you going on about?” 

“Why, your attraction to her, of course.” Zagreus seemed to misinterpret his shock for acknowledgment. “I knew something was off that one night we were all together, and the pieces have just been--” Zagreus was cut off by the sudden smacking away of his hand. 

“Are you an _imbecile_?” The god of death seethed, towering over Zagreus as he took to the air. “You think all of this has been about me having feelings for _Megaera?_ ” 

“Than, I don’t understand, I--” 

“No, clearly you don’t!” Thanatos caught the way the other god seemed to step back from his anger. Good. “This was never about what you were doing with _her_.” He grabbed Zagreus by his chiton now, nearly hoisting him into the air with Thanatos as he shook the prince. “It was about what she was doing with _you_.” He seethed at the memories of her teasing words, of the sight of that offensive bite mark-- 

The god of death was dispelled of his anger at the feeling of tentative hands coming to wrap around his wrists. He stared back at his prince. Zagreus had stared death down many times, but the way he now stared down Death himself made said god feel utterly wrecked. Wordlessly, he lowered them both back to the ground. 

“Than,” Zagreus’ voice was barely audible. “Oh, my Than.” The prince had not released his wrists, and now began to tug at them in earnest, the fabric of his chiton parting as he did so. Thanatos watched as Zagreus unintentionally bore his chest to him, a familiar hunger pooling in his stomach. He could descend on the other god now, lay him to waste in his own bedchambers...in his deepest fantasies, he almost missed the way his prince was trembling.

He realized Zagreus was scared. 

“I’m sorry,” Thanatos whispered. “This wasn’t, I never--” He covered Zagreus back up before pushing him away. “I’m sorry, Zag.” And once again, the god of death fled the scene. 

It turned out there had been a third option--be just enough of an asshole to hurt his love and still enough of a coward to run when it counted. 

* * *

The next few weeks were a worse hell than the pits of Tartarus for Thanatos. He didn’t go out into the other realms, didn’t dare to show his face to Zagreus, but instead received messages again and again of his failures and returns. He couldn’t recount the last time Zagreus had broken free to the surface, though even if he had, Thanatos hardly felt worthy of collecting him anymore. 

“Gods, you’re pathetic.”

“Good evening, Megaera.” Thanatos didn’t turn around to greet her, continuing to stare down into the Styx. 

“Is he on his way back now?”

“Why? Late to dinner, is he?” If Thanatos had not been floating then he likely would have stumbled over from the force in which Megaera spun him around. From the power in her shove, he had expected to see her angry with him. Instead, she just looked unimpressed. Their eyes locked, potentially sucking them into the staring contest of the century, if it were not for the return of an old pain in his chest. “Well don’t worry, he’ll be crawling back home soon enough.” 

“Zagreus and I aren’t like that, Than.”

“Is that what he told you the last time he brought you into his bed?” 

“I said we aren’t like that! You insufferable fool!” It took a moment for Thanatos to register that he had actually been slapped in the face. Megaera went on, “Zagreus was an easy target to rope into having some fun with me. Do you really not recall the original god he kept offering all of his precious nectar to?” Thanatos swallowed, feeling a bit like he was the fool Megaera had accused him of being. 

“...Why are you telling me all this?”

“Because I care.” Thanatos stared blankly at the Fury before raising an eyebrow. “Fine! Because I can’t handle this pity party anymore, on either side. It used to be thrilling to face off against Zagreus in Tartarus. These days it’s more like feeding into a damn suicide mission just so that he can hope you might show up again.”

Thanatos turned back to the river. The surface of the Styx broke open as Zagreus once more pulled himself out of it. 

“Okay,” he conceded to Megaera, turning back to face her. “While I am more inclined to believe your selfish reasons behind all this...thank you.” The Fury smirked. 

“Heh. If you really want to thank me, consider inviting me back into that bed sometime.” A near growl emanated from the god of death’s chest, though rather than feel threatened the Fury simply cackled before turning and making her leave. “Have fun, lover boy.” Thanatos’ brow wrinkled at the nickname, but he too soon made his leave.

Apparently someone was hoping he would arrive soon. 

* * *

“Hi,” Thanatos greeted softly as his weary prince entered his bedchambers. If not for the nervousness he could sense in Zagreus, he would swear how much the scene felt like deja vu. 

“Than,” Zagreus whispered in return, practically tip-toeing into the room as though he feared stirring a great beast. Thanatos supposed based on his last outburst that it wasn’t an unreasonable precaution. It was up to Thanatos to close the gap between them this go around. As he approached, he watched as Zagreus took note of the bruising alongside his face with a questioning look. 

“Your lover hits like a Fury.” His prince let out a snort and Thanatos managed a genuine smile for the first time in what felt like a long time. The joke managed to cut the tension of the room, if only for a moment.

“She isn’t my lover, you know,” Zagreus murmured as he seemed comfortable enough to help close the distance between them. He brought a hand up, question clear on his face, “can I?” Thanatos swallowed and nodded before shutting his eyes, allowing Zagreus’ fingers to gently press along his tender skin. 

“Zag,” Thanatos sighed, covering Zagreus’ prodding hand with his own. “I owe you an apolo--” 

A sudden kiss from Zagreus effectively cut off the god of death. 

A high keening sound filled the room and startled them both. Thanatos was too in shock to even realize the sound had come from his own throat. Zagreus, eyes wide and uncertain, began to pull away. 

“Hmm, no,” Thanatos pulled his prince back to him, arm wrapping around Zagreus’ slim waist. “Running away is my thing.” 

“And is that what’s going to happen? You’ll run?” Zagreus murmured, hands coming to rest on the god of death’s chest, mismatched eyes staring up at him. Thanatos refused to entertain the question with words, instead ducking his head down to claim Zagreus once more. 

They both moved more confidently this time, and more urgently. Zagreus stood on his toes, reaching up to lick at Thanatos’ lips. Thanatos was quick to yield, allowing Zagreus’ tongue to plunder his mouth, a soft moan escaping him. 

Thanatos moved to bring their bodies closer, their various adornments and armors clanking against each other awkwardly. 

“Blasted things…” The god of death grunted as he hastily shirked his own gauntlet to the ground before starting on Zagreus’ pauldrons. 

“Than-- wait, just-- _nngh_ \--” Zagreus fought to get a word in edgewise as Thanatos alternated between kissing him and moving as quickly as possible to remove them of their clothes. “I know this is all--this is all kind of _a lot_ \--” This time Thanatos’ winged pauldron hit the floor. “I wanted you to--” Both of their belts. “I wanted you to know this isn’t some impulsive thing for me.” The backs of Zagreus’ knees hit his bed just before he toppled onto it. The prince propped himself up on his elbows. “I’ll wait for you however long it takes.” 

The god of death blanched at the fool’s ramblings.

“ _Khh_!” Thanatos hoisted Zagreus’ legs in the air, fiddling with the buckles of his greaves. “You have no concept of which impulses to act upon, and which to keep in check.” He released Zagreus, working on his own armor now, paying no mind to where he tossed things. “You say you’ll _wait_? What are you waiting for?” Thanatos pulled his hood and his collar up over his head, slightly out of breath from how wildly he had been moving. 

“ _Than…_ ” 

“I’m _here_ , already.” Thanatos’ voice cracked, his tone raw and hungry as he stared down at the disheveled object of his desire. The one more precious to him than any keepsake. He stood over Zagreus, bare from the waist up. “Right…?”

“I--” He watched how Zagreus faltered only a moment before roaming his mismatched eyes over Thanatos’ newly bared skin. A shiver ran down the god of death’s spine, certain that he was desired by the other. He watched with pleading eyes and Zagreus finally nodded. “You’re right,” Zagreus conceded, dropping back down onto the mattress. He locked his legs around Thanatos’ waist as he did so, ensuring the god of death came down with him. 

“I got you,” Thanatos ensured just before claiming what was finally his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I thought this was would be two chapters, but this second part was getting so long I've decided to split it up one more time. Good news is Chapter 3 will be the delicious one? Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the yum as promised, if explicit sexual content isn't your thing, you can skip to “It’s been you, hasn’t it?”

Thanatos was certain that Zagreus must have somehow held onto the boons of the various Olympians in this rebirth. As soon as they collapsed onto the bed together, Thanatos’ whole body felt like it had been jolted by Zeus’ lightning. His limbs felt slow and heavy as though he had partaken in Dionysus’ finest libations. His chest grew tight as though perfectly pierced by one of Artemis’ arrows. 

“You are a wonder,” he declared quietly, propped up over Zagreus, close enough to watch his prince’s color deepen from the acknowledgment. Thanatos played with the shoulder clasp of Zagreus’ chiton, properly undoing it and parting the fabric to get a good look at just how far the flush reached. Zagreus was pink from the tips of his ears all the way down to his chest. 

Thanatos grinned, completely smitten as he traced along the area with his fingers, gently brushing one of Zagreus’ nipples as he did so. His prince’s chest arched back into the touch, encouraging Thanatos to more purposefully take his whole pec into his hand and squeeze. 

He brought their lips together once more, groaning softly as Zagreus’ fingers tangled in his own silvery white hair and tugged. Thanatos continued his ministrations against Zagreus’ chest, rolling the now pebbled nipple between his fingers. Zagreus thrust up against him again, Thanatos echoing a moan when he felt the other god’s excitement pressed against his thigh. 

It was so wonderfully different to be this close to Zagreus while the other god still breathed. Even better, that breathing was ragged and growing even choppier underneath him. Zagreus had died hundreds of times and Thanatos had carried each one with him. He retraced each death he could recall with his lips. 

_Decapitated by the bone hydra._ Thanatos broke their kiss to move his mouth along Zagreus’ jaw and down the column of his neck. Zagreus’ hands stayed in his hair, pulling gently whenever Thanatos was successful in finding a particularly sensitive spot. Thanatos nuzzled his nose just underneath the juncture where jaw met ear, inhaling deeply and sighing. 

_Pierced through the heart by Theseus._ His mouth continued south, spattering kisses along his prince’s sternum. Thanatos replaced the fingers around Zagreus’ nipple with his lips, sucking on the pert nub. Only when Zagreus began to thrash did he switch to the other one to offer equally thorough attention. 

_Disemboweled by Alecto._ Thanatos brought his hands down to Zagreus’ hips to balance himself, thumbs tucking underneath the band of his prince’s undergarments to run along the dips of his carved hip bones. The god of death flicked his tongue against Zagreus’ navel. His movements slowed down, licking and suckling along his prince’s abdomen as though someone had spilled precious ambrosia and it were up to Thanatos to make sure not a drop went to waste. 

He was certain the taste of Zagreus was far more intoxicating. 

“Than, you’re killing me.” Thanatos glanced up, watching as one of his prince’s hands fisted the sheets beneath them and the other was being worried in between Zagreus’ teeth, muffling his moans as his flush continued to spread further down his chest. 

“I certainly hope this is a sweeter Death than you are used to.” Zagreus whacked him on the shoulder for the terrible joke, Thanatos chuckling as he sat up to finally dispose of the prince’s final layer of clothing. He pulled Zagreus’ undergarments up over his legs, licking his lips as he watched his prince’s swollen cock gently bounce against his abdomen.

Still holding up one of Zagreus’ legs, Thanatos leaned over to kiss at his ankle bone. His heart beat wildly in his own chest as he thought of all the times this stubborn god had stood back up on these feet. He massaged his thumb against the bone, pressing his lips against the side of Zagreus’ knee, repeating the action against the tender part of his inner thigh, feeling the skin there twitch. 

Thanatos looked up again to further admire his prince, noticing that Zagreus had now thrown both of his forearms over his face, back beautifully arched as his whole body broke out in a soft tremble. He was about ready to continue before just catching the glimpse of tear tracks underneath where Zagreus was covering himself. 

“ _Agape_ ,” Thanatos whispered, gently tugging Zagreus’ arms away from him, “I’m so sorry, have I hurt you?” 

“No, no. You’re perfect, you’re wonderful, it’s--” His prince shuddered again, a fresh set of tears threatening to spill. “I wasn’t expecting you to be so _tender_ towards me.” 

“Are you disappointed?” Thanatos pulled back just a little. 

“You incredulous god,” Zagreus chided, adoration still clear in his voice. He sat up as well, moving to crawl into Thanatos’ lap. Thanatos welcomed him there, framing wet cheeks with his hands as his lips kissed away at the offending tear lines. 

“Like that,” Zagreus’ eyes fluttered shut as he wrapped his arms around the god of death’s neck, “you’re treating me like I’m precious.” 

“You _are_ precious,” Thanatos replied with some exasperation, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. 

“I just…” Zagreus trailed off a moment, Thanatos staring at him as encouragement to say what he needed to say. “I’m having a hard time reconciling how I’ve hurt you.” 

“I’ve hurt you, too,” Thanatos replied quietly, though no judgment was in his voice. “Does it mean I’m not worthy of being in your bed?” Zagreus shook his head immediately, looking at the god of death like he was insane. Thanatos smiled, pressing a kiss to Zagreus’ cheek. “I’ve told you, hurt...it can just be knowledge.” 

“Oh?” Zagreus mused, “And what’s the knowledge from this hurt then?” Thanatos could feel Zagreus pressed between their stomachs, the heat rolling off of his arousal. 

“That I must worship you.” He caught how his prince shuddered at the resolve in his tone. “Please Agape, allow me to worship you.” 

Zagreus didn’t reply with words, leaning forward to press their lips back together. Thanatos hummed into the kiss, one hand gently cradling the back of Zagreus’ head, the other moving to wrap around the hard, hot shaft of Zagreus’ cock. Zagreus preened at the attention, hips jutting forward.

Thanatos obeyed the unspoken request, thumb pressing into the moistened tip to smear the precum that had collected there around before beginning to pump Zagreus in slow and firm strokes. 

“Beautiful,” Thanatos remarked as Zagreus moaned, breaking the kiss as his back arched to lean closer into Thanatos’ ministrations. The god of death moved his mouth back to the column of his prince’s neck, nibbling and kissing at the heated skin there. 

“Nngh, Than--” Thanatos released his own moan into Zagreus’ shoulder as the other god ground his bare ass down against Thanatos’ hips. Zagreus appeared to squirm in recognition of something, the prince’s hands moving down to the hem of clothes Thanatos still wore. 

Thanatos pressed their foreheads together, sucking in a tight breath as Zagreus pulled his own erection out of his pants and gave the length a squeeze in return. They kissed again, tongues sloppily tangling together as they jerked each other off. 

He wanted more, and at the same time had been wound up for so many months, wasn’t sure he could hold on for much longer. Zagreus seemed to be struggling with the same need, his prince’s hip thrusts into his hand becoming more erratic and choppy. Thanatos grunted, spitting into his palm before batting Zagreus’ hand away to take a grip on both of their lengths. 

“Gods, how is your hand _big_ enough for that?” His prince looked down at the sight and whined in arousal as he brought his arms back around Thanatos’ neck to maintain balance. Thanatos smirked, imagining the question to be rhetorical as he continued to pump them both, chest heaving at the effort it was to keep his orgasm at bay. 

“Agape-- _Zagreus_ , I--” He was sputtering now, eyes glossy with need, chest aching at the realization that he was finally receiving everything he had wanted. 

“Tell me, Than, oh please…” Zagreus rambled back, spattering sloppy kisses all over Thanatos’ face as they neared the edge together. Thanatos shook as a particularly gentle kiss landed just to the side of his eye, swearing he could feel Zagreus’ long lashes fluttering against his temple as he placed it. 

Thanatos opened his mouth but no sound came out of it, eyes screwing shut as he came in between them, hot spurts of his release coating both of their stomachs as he continued to pump. However he must have looked in that moment seemed to be the trigger to push Zagreus over the edge as well, his prince’s back bending beautifully as he climaxed soon after. 

They exhaled in unison, returning to each other with languid kisses and slow touches. Thanatos milked what was left in both of them, only releasing his grip when it was clear from both of their squirming that they were nearing over stimulation. He sighed into Zagreus’ mouth, spent and giddy and exhausted and so in awe. 

“Than,” Zagreus whispered between them like he was casting a secret spell. Thanatos looked into his favorite mismatched eyes, breath hitching at the pure adoration he found being directed at him. “I love you.” 

Time in the room slowed down as Thanatos thought of what had brought them here. The bottles of nectar, the contests of strength. The jealousy and misunderstandings, the running away and coming back together. 

Already confident in his answer, Thanatos spoke his echoed three word reply into the air of the silent bedchamber. If this time he was the one to spill a few tears, Zagreus did not say anything. 

* * *

“It’s been you, hasn’t it?” Zagreus asked as Thanatos kissed lazily at the back of his neck. The two gods had long since wiped themselves down and crawled under the bed sheets. Zagreus’ back was now slotted against Thanatos’ front. 

“What’s been me?” Thanatos asked genuinely, unable to connect the dots in his post-coital fog. Zagreus rolled over to face his lover, hand coming to rest on his cheek. 

“You’ve been the one to collect me, at the surface. The way I’ve felt held then and now...it’s the same, isn’t it?” 

“I’ll have you know I have never once challenged your chastity while you were dead, Zag.” His prince pinched his cheek, laughing at the joke but not backing down from his question. Thanatos wet his lips. “Are you mad?” 

“ _Mad?_ How could I be mad?” 

“I know your time with Persephone is precious to you.” 

“Than,” Zagreus waited for a beat, seemingly collecting his thoughts. “You’ve said it to me twice now. That pain or hurt, it can just be knowledge, right?” Thanatos quietly nodded. “Then imagine how blessed I must be to know that the hurt of a natural death comes with the knowledge that you will soon be there to hold me. It is perhaps the most precious boon I have ever received.” 

Thanatos cleared his throat, blinking rapidly as the weight of what Zagreus was saying really sank in. He hid his face in the crook of Zagreus’ neck, distracting himself by sucking on the skin there. Zagreus laughed softly at the tickling sensation, realizing that part of their conversation was likely done and opting to hold his lover close to him. 

“You know those marks will fade as soon as I return from the Styx, don’t you?” 

“All the more reason to carry you home and leave them again, my prince.” Zagreus blushed at the suggestion. He rolled on top of Thanatos, bed sheet pooling at his thighs to reveal his once again growing arousal. 

“By all means then,” Zagreus murmured, dipping down to deepen a kiss between them. 

Perhaps Thanatos had found his new favorite way to encourage Zagreus to stay out of Tartarus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! My first multi-chapter fic complete. I hope you have read this far that you have enjoyed it! Leave me some love if you did, I'm on a Hades kick so if you have something you want to see, I'm down for suggestions


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